What should you wear to a funeral?
How casual is too casual for a funeral?
What were they thinking?
Have you been to a funeral recently? Were you a little surprised or even shocked at what people were wearing? I have a lot of readers writing to me in dismay and asking my advice. Recently the media wanted my opinion as a corporate image consultant on how to dress for funerals.
Business casual begat funeral casual
Business casual has spawned funeral casual. Many people don’t know what’s appropriate to wear for business. So is it any wonder that many don’t seem to understand what’s appropriate to wear to a funeral. Here are a few tips and advice for Canadians and Americans attending funerals.
Tip #1 – Ultimately it’s about respect
Think about the family. Older people tend to be more conservative in their dress and may be disappointed by those that dress overly casual. They will see it as a sign of disrespect.
Tip #2 – What are the circumstances?
The circumstances of death, the age and personality of the deceased person should be taken into consideration.
Tip #3 – Religious service
If there is a religious service, then dresses for women and suits or sports coats for men are recommended. Consider the religious and cultural standards of the deceased and their families.
Tip #4 – Celebration of life
A celebration of life is a less sombre occasion. If someone has lived a long or a full life, dressing with colour can be appropriate. If the deceased is a child, then dressing in softer more muted colours may be fitting.
Tip #5 – When in doubt
People will rarely tell you if you’ve offended them by being dressed too casual. When in doubt dress it up. You’re never going to offend anyone if you dress more conservatively or formally. Women should try not to bare too much skin and keep accessories to a minimum. Men can go for a suit or at least a sports jacket.
Click here to see the media article Avoiding Funeral Fashion Faux Pas on Canada .com by Manisha Krishnan of the Edmonton Journal.
Hi Lori,
Thank you for your question which may have been prompted by Remembrance Day ceremonies across the country. There is much written about poppy etiquette and military personnel dress but very little dealing with suggested dress for dignitaries or the general public.
While darker neutrals have traditionally been worn for funerals and more somber occasions, it appears that the pendulum has swung somewhat. It was interesting to note that the Prime Minister of Canada and his spouse chose to wear softer neutrals (dove gray and camel).
Personally, I would err on the side of being more conservative and wear darker colours to blend in rather than stand out, and to show respect for the occasion.
Joanne, wondering what your thoughts are about a formal memorial ceremony and what national dignitaries should wear.
Joanne, wondering what your thoughts are about a formal memorial ceremony and what national dignitaries should wear.
I just read a unique obituary this morning. The photo of the woman that had passed away portrays someone who looks vibrant and exciting. In her memory guests have been invited to wear bright colours to the celebratation of her life.