posted Jan 11, 2012 in Etiquette & Manners / Networking / by Terry Pithers / 3 comments

2012 the year to be real, not perfect

Terry makes a perfect New Year's resolution

Are you a perfectionist? Isn't it tough being a perfectionist?

Perfectionists of the world unite.

So if you're a perfectionist like me and there's a lot of us out there, let's try to let go of it together. And I'm going to work at it until I'm perfectly successful. (See, even when we try to not be perfectionists we want to be perfect at doing that too.)

Perfectionism is so draining

It takes so long to do things if you're a perfectionist. You wouldn't believe how long it takes me to get these blogs out. (If you're perfectionist, you might.) I write and rewrite and rewrite. If Joanne gives me her copy to put up on the website, I have to tweak it, rewrite it, and then re-tweak it again.

Life with a perfectionist is draining too

Speaking of Joanne, it’s not easy being in a relationship with a perfectionist. This behavior stands in the way of our lives, careers and even our relationships. Because we perfectionists know that there are right way and wrong ways of doing things. The right way is generally the way that we do things. The perfect way.

Life can be easier and more fun

Our seminars are fun and engaging but our best presentations come about when we are in the moment and often when we make a mistake. When I allow myself to make a mistake, it frees me up, frees Joanne up and frees the audience up. We all get to have some fun and react.

Let's face it, we're not building the Sistine Chapel

In our newsletter and blog entries often the ones that get the most comments are the ones where I have made a mistake.

In the Renaissance craftsmen believed that only God was capable of perfection, so they would intentionally inset a flaw or a mistake into their work. What a freeing concept!

Only the creator is capable of perfection

So as a way of getting over and taking my first 2012 steps towards letting go of perfectionism, I have intentionally left some mistakes in this blogg (all you fellow perfectionists see if you can find them and point them out to me. I will try not to cringe.) I have also inserted some photos of me looking goofy from some presentations on image and networking we made for the University of Alberta Alumni Association and the photos are courtesy of photogragher Sam Brooks. (The captions are my own and yes they're not perfect, yet.)

Do as I say not as I do

As we often mention in our seminars, people enjoy spending time with people they know, like and trust. Having a self-deprecating sense of humor, not taking yourself too seriously and not being such a perfectionist goes a long way for building that like and trust. And really perfectionism isn't  being authentic - it's constantly editing everything.

Together we can do it

Any other perfectionists out there? I know there's a perfect horde of you. What New Year's resolutions are you trying this year? remember they don't have to be perfect.

(I'm feeling beter already)

Posted by Terry Pithers -The Business Etiquette Expert and sometimes imperfect guy